Eat, Pray, Shrek

{{NSFW}}
>be me
>be 13
>dusted off old game boy
>found shrek the game for gbc
>favorite game of my child hood
>fuck ya
>put in cartridge and turn on
>play through first lvl, rage quit and throw gbc
>hear something on roof
>bang loud crash
>start coughing at dust and debree from crash
>the smell of onions fills the air
>mfw it's shrek
>he looks at me and says aye laddie that's a sin
>he takes out a big bag of onions
>starts eating all of them lightening fast
>never seen anyone eat onions so fast
>hory shit
>he looks through the windows of my soul and says
>get cha arse over here laddie, right now
>scared and excited at the same time I walk over
>shrek lays me on my back and begins to squat on my face
>he proceeds to shit down my throat
>each luscious turd dropping down my esophagus
>they each have a different taste more pungent than the next one as they begin to fill my heart with warmth
>he finally finishes his duty and puts me on my knees
>looking up into his eyes he shoves his triumphant phallus in my mouth and down my throat to prevent the fecal matter from coming back up
>shrek then turns me around with brute force as he shoves his member into my virgin butthole
>He thrusts back and forth as my legs begin to feel weak from his love
>breaks mai shrektial wallz
>he yells it's not ogre till I'm ogre
>he lets out a mighty ogre roar as we both combust out of pure pleasure at the same time
>I begin spewing up his toilet beef all over the walls
>omfg
>I'm shitting out of my mouth
>diarrhea puke
>but it feels so right
>he then turns me around and mushroom stamps my face with his cock
>ouch
>he gives me a fatherly scolding look
>I think we all learned something taday laddie, now finish what ya started
>picks up gbc and hands it to me
>then smiles and winks at me
>bowel juice and big cock stamp on my face, I smile back at him
>I finally understand nao
>imabeliever_smashmouth.mp3
>he flies out my window
>I dont know how I was going to clean the mess in my room up b4 rents get home
>doesn't matter had shrex
>shrek is love, shrek is life